Each parent knows that any, even the quietest and obedient child can be capricious, zanyt, turn obstinate and spoil mood to all people around. Readers of InfoAdvisor.net know that there are children who born "kaprizul", and with them are rather afraid to remain the even most loving grandmothers, and consider them as a real handful. I think that each parent faced this problem.
So to do if you have a whimsical child? The site InfoAdvisor.net recommends the next ways.
The whim reason – to draw attention
The child often does not have attention. We, adult, constantly occupied with the affairs: work, study, cleaning, communication with friends, the computer and viewing of telecasts, we want that the child grandly sat in a corner and played with toys, without bringing upon us trouble. We buy for it expensive and we are surprised why the child does not play, and aches and is capricious. For example, it is not pleasant to the child that mother speaks by phone, he wants that she played with it, talked or read the book. And it starts aching, gradually passing to shout.
The best exit in this situation, likely, after all to pay to the child attention. It is possible to tell: "Now we a little bit will play, and then I will wash the dishes". Or: "I now will finish speaking by phone, and we will read the book". It is important that expectation of the child was not tightened for a long time, and it is impossible to deceive him. If promised – it is necessary to make.
Even if overflow emotions – try to keep calm
However, despite all your efforts, the child calms down does not wish, and the hysterics gains steam. What to do if the child is capricious, and no arrangements help?
By no means it is impossible to raise the voice on the child, to beat him or to punish. In this case the child can cannot stop shout to blue and spasms, and educational effect will be equal to zero. And to calm him, then it will be very difficult. Though, I know on myself as it is difficult to restrain and as there is a wish to shout at it in reply.
In such situation - to tell the most reasonable to the little rowdy: "Let's talk about it when you calm down" and to leave on kitchen to wash the dishes or to make a lunch. It helps also most to calm down, and to let know to the child that a hysterics and whims he desirable will not receive. My eldest son grew very whimsical child. With it this tactics worked practically always. It is important to choose such occupation which can be interrupted at any time for communication with the child when he "comes to be reconciled".
Application of policy of a compromise
Well, the most terrible behind – the child calmed down, but smearing on the person of a tear and hiccupping from the postponed hysterics, continues (by already low voice) to ask wished (ice cream, a live dog, walk in the yard, a trip to circus etc.). If a request quite feasible for you, it is possible to talk quietly to the child about inadmissibility of shouts and hysterics, and to tell that he will receive desirable when completely calms down.
If the child asks something unattainable (for example, the machine with radio control when you have in a purse last 100 rubles, or these machines so many that about them all family already stumbles, or to get a dog in the apartment, and it does not include in your plans), the policy of a compromise comes to the rescue. Instead of a dog it is possible to promise a campaign in a zoo in the next day off, instead of expensive machine – to buy cheaper and so on – details will be prompted by the imagination and knowledge of features of the child.
The case from own childhood was remembered. At the age of three-four years I saw drawing of the rocket on which children fly on the Moon in the children's book, and began to demand to send from mother me to the Moon in the rocket. And I was simply obsessed with this rocket and sobbed, of anything could not think any more. Then mother made of a big carpet to me "rocket", and we did "space suit" by all family, pasting newspapers on the globe, and then painting with paints. So my parents turned a whim into business, useful and fascinating for me.
Attempt to distract the child
The policy of a compromise suits for children is more senior – since three-four years. And how to be with absolutely small whimsical children to whom give wished "here and now"? In most cases it is possible to distract the child: "Oh, look, what car went behind a window", "Let's look with you ", "Take an apple (a favourite bear, the machine of the elder brother)".
It is impossible to beat and offend by no means
If any of the given methods did not help and the child continues to choke with shout (and at times it happens in a public place that is twice unpleasant), it is important to continue to keep calm, but not to beat him and not to offend. Insults to the child do not help to stop a hysterics, and develop at him various complexes.
Once I witnessed such scene: in McDonald's the boy of years of five laid down on a floor and could not stop shout. Mother, without telling the word, raked up it in an armful and left. Likely, it is the most correct option of behavior.
Children copy our behavior, reflect on it
Each of us often asks a question: "How to behave with the whimsical child?". It is important to remember that children copy us both in bad, and in the good. And looking at unpleasant sides of behavior of the child, reflect, but whether you achieve wished by means of a hysterics? Or your husband likes to show native by means of shout, who in the house the owner?