The people who assumed a difficult and responsible role of adoptive parents are worthy all respect. Not without reason in the Bible it is told that accepted the orphan to the house stand to the right of the Lord. Their love and patience will create a miracle the - the thrown, devoted little man will believe in human kindness and will incur it further. According to about 60% of adopted children, having become adults, take in the families of orphans on education.
The reasons for which become adoptive parents
The decision to take in a family of the adopted child has to be comprehensively considered and coordinated with all members of household. If you simply read on the Internet of the sensitive articles illustrated by the thrown kids do not start rashly rescuing them from an orphanhood. The rush, even kind, is inappropriate here. Fleeting pity will soon turn back heavy moral and physical activities.
Think, for what reason you take on education of foreign child? Want to escape from loneliness and boredom, to grow up the supporter, the nurse on an old age? Consider, what the children's home orphan will be able to strengthen the weakened bonds of marriage or to replace the died child? If so, you risk to be disappointed cruelly.
Foreign kid – not panacea, but difficult test for a family and especially for lonely people. The most worthy reason, of course, when the child is taken for the sake of the child. You can give it chance to get a good education, strong to get on feet, to live the better life.
Forms of the family device of children
There are some forms of the family device of the children deprived of care of parents. Let's consider in more detail two most widespread – adoption and a capture under guardianship.Adoption.
This the form is priority for the state and for potential parents as the child finds a full-fledged family. Readers Mirsovetov have to know that the rights and duties of adoptive parents in relation to the child same, as at parents.
You can appropriate it the surname, a middle name (a name usually leave what is), to change date of birth. The child will feel the family member. On an equal basis with your own children he acquires a right of succession, in case of divorce – the right for . The same as the own children, he is obliged to support aged parents.
If adoption is through your fault terminated through court, you will pay the child to the 18 anniversary the certain sum which is usually not exceeding a living wage.
Strict requirements are imposed to the income and living conditions of adoptive parents. Adoption can be issued only through court. The state does not bear responsibility for your decision and does not give any help after adoption, except a lump sum at the child's device in a family. If for you it is the second and subsequent child, the certificate on is issued.Guardianship.
This type of the family device of children means acceptance of the child to the house as the pupil. The head of local administration makes the decision on appointment to the trustee's child. The trustee carries out the duties gratuitously.
The state, except a lump sum at the child's device in a family, monthly gives out an allowance for food and clothes (in Chelyabinsk region – 4000 rubles), provide privileges for payment of housing and communal services, gives help in the organization of treatment, training, rest vospituyemy.
Besides, the parents have to pay the alimony and if such parent dies, on the child the pension on is paid.
The grant to those wards which parents are not deprived of the parental rights is not paid and is able to support the child, but voluntary transferred him under others guardianship. On achievement of 18 years the state provides to the ward housing if he has no that. In this regard do not make out to the ward continuous registration in the apartment since it can be interpreted by the law as the actual fixing to the child of housing to the trustee's address.
Rights and trustee's duties
Article of Art. 148.1 of the RF IC establishes the right and a duty of trustees and trustees to bring up the child who is under guardianship (guardianship) to care about its health, physical, mental, spiritual and moral development, of its training and education, the contents, to protect its rights and interests.
The trustee is obliged to live together with the ward and is his only lawful representative. If your juvenile pupil did the actions harm to the state or the third parties, you bear before them full moral and a liability.
Every month you in writing report to the inspector of guardianship, on what the provided means are spent. Checks and receipts for the given-out sum have to be attached to the report.
At any time the staff of agencies of guardianship can be to your house with check of a sanitary condition of housing and living conditions of the child. Experts of OOP have the right selectively to verify the things acquired for the child according to your report; to interrogate neighbors, teachers, the pupil if they had any questions on your methods of education of the ward.
You cannot interfere with blood relatives of the child to see him even if they are deprived of the parental rights. If there is an applicant for adoption of your pupil, in case of the positive decision of the child will transfer to it.
Appeal to agencies of guardianship and guardianship
Having weighed everything pros and cons, you after all made the decision to take under guardianship of the children's home child.
Your first action – the appeal to regional body of guardianship and guardianship (OOP) for conversation with the expert. Take with yourself the passport and the marriage certficate. If you are lonely, it is not an obstacle for adoption or acceptance under guardianship. Cannot take the child of the person 60 years and also deprived of the parental rights for the children, discharged of guardianship for inadequate fulfillment of duties, having certain diseases are more senior. The complete list of restrictions is provided in Art. 127 of the Family Code of the Russian Federation.
Package of the documents necessary for guardianship
After conversation with the inspector will issue you the form of the medical certificate with the list of doctors whom you have to bypass. If you have an oncology, , mental diseases, sore heart – to you not to pass the commission.
To readers of InfoAdvisor.net at once I advise zaydt in to Department of Internal Affairs (Department of Internal Affairs) and to order the certificate of lack of a criminal record. Sometimes it is necessary to wait for it long.
In the following visit to agencies of guardianship and guardianship you on hands have to have following documents:
- Medical certificate about a state of your health and opportunity to accept the child on education.
- The reference about the income with the indication of a position and salary or the certified declaration on the income.
- Certificate of lack of a criminal record.
- The documents confirming existence at you of the housing sufficient for accommodation of one more person.
- The statement of the established sample for desire to adopt or take the child under guardianship (it is filled in OOP).
After verification of documents workers of guardianship come out to you to the house for an assessment of living conditions. To the adopted child has to be the separate berth and a table for occupations is taken away. The disabled child, the HIV-positive requires the certain room.
Search of the child
Having received the decision about opportunity to be the trustee or the adoptive father, you can begin search of the child. Experts of OOP are obliged to provide you information on children which status allows to be adopted or taken under guardianship. If those were not in your area, you have the right to look for the child by means of a regional and federal databank, both in the next territories, and on all federation.
When the suitable candidacy is found, the inspector of OOP is obliged to give out you the direction on visit of the child who is in a shelter, children's home, hospital, etc. At once ask a contact information of the head of this establishment. In advance phone to it when it is better to arrive for acquaintance to the child.
At visit try to ask the personnel on a condition of mental and physical health of the kid when and why it appeared in children's home as develops, than differs from other children. Are obliged to give you full information and to acquaint with documents of the child.
Do not blame yourself if the child for some reason or other was not pleasant to you, something pushed away. Do not listen to the offended exclamations of tutors and inspectors of guardianship that "you do not choose the child". The kid has to fit to you on heart, attract, sink down that is called in soul. Probably, adoptions, as well as marriages, too consist in heavens.
On acceptance of a final decision 10 days are given. On the expiration of this term you write on the form of the direction or a consent to adoption (guardianship) of this child or refusal with a reason explanation. The number of the directions on visit of children is not limited, and you can continue search.
To take or not to take the child for the weekend?
At last you found "the" kid. Some at first take it home for the weekend to get used, look narrowly. In my opinion, uncertain people in the decision so do. Good these guest moments will not bring anything. The small child in others place will be nervous, all night long will not allow anybody to sleep, and in the morning for certain it will be wet.
Five-six-year-old children, by my experience, in general are unpredictable: rules of behavior are not known on a visit, do not take you seriously, do not obey. After their departure can miss money and jewelry. It is unlikely it will strengthen you in the decision to accept to the house of such child.
Possible problems at education of the adopted child
The thought-up image of the little orphan who is made happy with you has nothing in common with reality. I want to tell readers Mirsovetov that serious problems with adaptation in the normal environment as are unfamiliar with it have most of the thrown children. They got used not to live, and to survive, and for this purpose all means are good. Kindness and love are a little familiar to them. The child can take these manifestations for weakness, will start trying your patience, to organize protest actions. You have to be ready to it.
We took from a shelter under guardianship the girl Dasha of 5,5 years. Before it half a year was in a family care group at the employee of a shelter at home. Lived on heating mains with the drinking mother even earlier.
The first year was very heavy. The daughter started "building" us at once on the understanding. Refused to rise, wash in the morning, threw a toothbrush with words: "I that now, all life have to ?". In a garden fought, broke toys, covered with a string of obscenities and children, and teachers. At home told heart-breaking stories how all offend her …
We then started a situation a little, having treated the girl, as the ordinary house child. As a result the daughter ceased to perceive us as adults, was insolent, waved away from requests, could push.
Dasha was weakened and was ill on two times a month. Quinsies, , cold, stomatitises, conjunctivitis. I as it was protected, nevertheless often caught from it. Problems at work began, it was necessary to connect the mother-in-law. It also took our Darya in echinoid mittens.
Everything appeared not so difficult – the girl simply needed a strong hand. The mother-in-law gradually and steadily pursued the policy of traditional education and demanded the same from us. In the house the day regimen, obligatory rituals, rigid control of execution of the charged set in. The situation began to change slowly for the better.
The first that I want to tell – do not follow the tastes. Check everything that the child told and made. Rip in the bud lies, hysterics, attempts to manipulate you. Somehow at clear-out I found Daryina "grist".
There were coins from a husband's collection, a silver chain of the nurse of a kindergarten, my gone , expensive models of machines (took away from the boy in the yard). The daughter together with me returned things to owners, we apologized. Then she was punished – for the first time we did not go to a concert of children's variety group which she adored.
So, step by step, we moved ahead on the found road. Now, in two years, I can tell that the girl became more operated, does not demand constant attention.
At the time of acceptance in a family any thrown child has problems of psychological, genetic, physiological character. The special attention and support are necessary for it. It is a lot of time and forces you will spend before feel in it warm attachment and full confidence to you, his new parents.